When and how should we start potty training?

Is your little one already befriending the potty, sitting on it, carrying it round the house, asking about it? That can be a sign for you. Dry days will only turn into true success when your child is genuinely ready, and they will show you. Every child develops at their own pace. Patience is essential, and little accidents are a natural part of learning. Together they make potty training a shared adventure filled with love, sweet moments and play.

If your child is not ready yet and we introduce the potty too soon, they might sit on it and even manage to wee, but that still does not mean potty training has begun. At this stage it is mostly play and curiosity. You may notice that after a few goes the potty no longer interests them and it is ignored for quite a while. When the real time comes, you will see clear, deliberate and consistent steps from your child.

When is the right time?

The best approach is to watch your child’s body language and tiny clues. Are they staying dry for longer stretches? Do they slip into another room when they need a poo? Are they interested in the potty ritual? Readiness typically appears around 2 to 2.5 years, while full daytime dryness often develops during the third year.

Sometimes you will hear success stories about very early control at 1 to 1.5 years. This is not true potty training. It usually happens because parents time and assist toileting based on the child’s patterns, even lifting them at night while half-asleep. With patience this is not harmful, but it is unnecessary. It is harmful if a child is shamed after accidents. Shaming is never appropriate, and it is especially unfair if the expectation is beyond the child’s current abilities.

Do not force potty training 

Potty training is the result of a complex developmental process that we need to wait for. Your child must be physiologically ready, able to feel the urge and hold it by consciously using their sphincter muscles.

They also need to learn and understand that they are becoming a nappy-free big kid, just like the older ones. They observe parents on the toilet and want to imitate them. They want to be like those who no longer wear nappies.

Finally, they must be able to signal in time that they need to go. Even in nursery years children sometimes get so absorbed in play that they delay going and end up dribbling.

Sensing the urge to wee or poo develops as the nervous system matures. It cannot be rushed. Wait patiently for the right moment. This way your child can reach this stage in their own natural tempo and gather successes along the way. Then coming out of nappies often takes only a few days. If we push too early, the process can drag on with setbacks and lots of frustration for the child.

Let us respect our child’s needs, pace and readiness. Ask only what they can already manage, and practise patiently. Why do parents get impatient? A common reason is the September start of nursery, where daytime dryness is often expected.

Should we or should we not? 

Everything is right that respects the child’s natural development and does not create fear, guilt or shame. When a child is interested in toileting, they often follow the adult into the bathroom, observe and want to take part. Explain, let them be curious, and answer their questions. Show them the toilet and toilet paper, and how to use them.

If readiness arrives in summer, you are in luck, because playing outdoors without a nappy is much easier. Children can observe their own bodily signals and feel more freedom. Reusable nappies may, in theory, speed awareness because wetness is felt more clearly. Experiences and opinions on this are mixed.

Once you are practising weeing in the potty, introduce one or two tiny routines that help build awareness. For example, have a wee before going out, and again before lunch and before sleep. These are practical habits, and your child will meet them at nursery as well.

A few golden rules to keep in mind:

• Do not scold a child for accidents. There is always a reason. They may not be ready, there may be emotional factors such as a new sibling, or a simple urinary irritation. Sometimes they were just distracted.

• Do not make them sit on the potty by force.

• Do not shame them for still needing a nappy.

Negative experiences can lead to later anxiety.

Playfulness often works best 

Play is a key form of self-expression for children. If they can discover, understand and learn new things through play, they accept them more easily and enjoy them. Good play offers freedom of choice and space to explore without unnecessary limits.

Make it a shared experience with a favourite teddy, a story or a little silliness. If your child feels awkward about poo or feels shy, humour can ease the tension.

Potty, toilet or other helpers? 

The potty is usually the first step. There are many shapes and sizes, lower or higher, smaller or bigger. Some look like a miniature adult toilet with a lid. Children like them because they are easy to use and carry, and they are handy when travelling by car.

Some children prefer the adult toilet, because they want to copy their parents. There are great solutions for this. Classic toilet reducers now come in soft, cushioned versions and in safe laddered styles with handgrips, which give a real sense of independence. You can also get removable child toilet seats. For travel there are foldable and raised options designed for children.

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